J.A.’s : Things we do because we are suppose to but rather not

J.A. Laraque on Oct 25, 2009 in Article

Don’t worry part two to J.A. cares is coming as soon as I have something I think that works. In the meantime I have been able to spend some time out in the real world and have observed many of the little things we have to do and say to be accepted in society. Starting yet another series, here are some of the things we do because we are suppose to but rather not in no particular order.

#238 – Tell someone you are sorry that some random person they knew died

The topic of Death is like the topic of weight gain, you are sorry it happened, but not in the way the person you said “sorry” to took it. First of all if you did not know the person at all you really don’t care. Sure, you see a dog get hit and you go “damn that’s messed up”, but do you really care, really, didn’t think so.

It is acceptable to say “I’m sorry” most of the time unless it’s a really close relative or family member or friend you are “sorry” he brought it up and killed the mood. I mean unless you are trying to score sympathy points with a girl to shag her then why bring it up?

“Oh my cousin from backwater Texas died, I didn’t really know her.”

Why the hell did you tell me this? Was my conversation about next week’s football game boring you so much that you thought of your dead cousin you hardly knew? What do you expect me to say when you tell me some random person attached to your family died? Unless the sentence is followed up by; “And she left me a million dollars let’s go to Vegas” I really don’t care.

Women I can understand doing this, they need to bleed drama and emotions from time to time or it will poison their bodies, but men. Nobody wants to think about death besides EMO’s and terrorist bombers (one and the same) so do use a favor and keep death announcements like those to yourself.

Here’s an idea. Keep a notepad with you and every time someone obscure (see what I did there) in your life dies write it down. When you get to fifty names just hand the note to whomever you want to and say; “Check out my death list” this will get you points for being unique and creepy, but at least you will be interesting.

Yes, I am a dick

There are tons of other things we do just because and I hope to cover them all. If you have some you do, post a comment about it and maybe we can share some stories. For now I’m going to go watch Californication and pretend I’m Hank Moody.